Soft Dreams on a Bed of Nails

I said to you that I dreamt of saving
kittens from a downpour last night


I repeated, uncertain
if you had heard me
or if I'd even spoken
at all

you found my behavior perplexing
stating that I haven't a single kind
bone in my body
but perhaps, you said,
it is a sign of improvement

your shoulders dropped,
at ease
I don't think you noticed
you were tense
you've always been wary
of our physical closeness
this is the first time in memory
where you actually relaxed

maybe I shouldn't mention that I
killed those helpless kittens
not long after saving them
that the rain dripping from the ceiling
ran thick with their blood

maybe I should let you think
I might not be a complete
monster after all
I like the thought of you
sleeping under a false sense
of security